You May Keep the Diamonds, But Please Stop Naming Them.

Crater of Diamonds State Park in Arkansas is the only public place in the world where you can find a diamond and keep it. Apparently, you also get to name it. Gary Dunlap of Arkansas found a 2.37 carat stone on the last day of 2006 and named it the "Star of Thelma". Now I'm the last person that should be making fun of a name, and I'm not making fun of the name "Thelma". It's a fine name. It just doesn't have that "diamond" ring to it. (I know, I know, a pun! I hated to write it, but it was the word that worked best.) But I must give a salute to Mr. Dunlap for thinking of his wife and honoring her, it is a commendable thing to do. To be fair, Mr. Dunlap isn't alone. A fellow from Oklahoma named a diamond he found back in September the "Okie-Dokie Diamond".

To nip this trend in the bud, here is a list of potential diamond names that should be avoided:

Joe Bob's Shiny Rock
Ice Ice Baby and/or Vanilla Ice
Star of Jones
Rosie's Gem
BabyDaddy Diamond
FreeBird
Dazzling Mullet
Star'nizzle Dia'mizzle

In addition, please refrain from using these or any combination of the following when naming your diamond:

Paris, Hilton, Trump, Britany, Spears, K-Fed, P. Diddy, Puff, Daddy, Lohan, Nicole, Larry, Moe, Curly, The Rock, Bling, Cabbage, Firebird, Trans-Am, Van Halen, NASCAR, Led Zepplin, Lynard Skynard and Candy.


What would you name your diamond?